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Category Archives: Men’s Articles – Sex

Blind Date

By Jackson Morris

One of the first television shows that Tom Selleck ever did was “The Dating Game”. Many big names have done shows they are probably not so proud of in the name of furthering both career and ego. I am guilty of this act numerous times over. In addition to a one time appearance on Nash Bridges I have appeared on or worked on the dating shows Love Connection, 5th Wheel, Rendezvous and two episodes of Blind Date.

It was one of those episodes of Blind Date that would be my pinnacle of television dating notoriety. I would not garner any awards like an Emmy or even get a “mention” for my performance but the episode is still in rerun syndication almost 5 years later. My family in Omaha, Nebraska even saw it a month ago, that is how much they play it.

I am a pro in the dating world but under the lights, camera, action it is a little harder for even a seasoned player like myself. Apparently when big daddy is in the zone with a girl, score or not, I will have a good time even if that means making a fool out of myself – which is exactly how they described me when they showed me in a near death accident on TV’s Bloopers and Blunders.

On The Set Of Blind Date

I did this show for one reason and one reason only – stardom! I was a struggling stand-up comic and writer living in southern California and any TV time is TV time. When I went on I thought to myself, “If producers and directors see me using humor to romance a girl on TV for a free meal and a couple hundred bucks that I would be a natural for romantic comedies.

Unbeknownst to me the producers had different notions and basically set me up with a girl who was the antithesis of my wish list. I asked for a girl with a “higher education” and at minimum she had to have a Bachelor’s Degree. This chick had no degree, a bad set of fake tits, no brain and she worked wearing the second t-shirt of three that spelled BUD-WEI-SER as a bar girl.

This girl had a job as a t-shirt. Thanks Tom (Tom is the prick producer who had a knack of talking me into shit constantly). I am clearly the biggest sucker in television dating history.

After driving around in the DVR mobile that digitally video records every word and move out of you had nothing on her because that empty melon had nothing to offer but a mix of grunts and sighs. I have met a lot of dumb chicks in my life (I was married) but this broad is capable of locking herself IN the car with the keys.

Fame From Blind Date

So my first big TV moment that would later be made fun of on Bloopers & Blunders would come when the producers of Blind Date thought it would be fun for me and dumb ass to go “terrain blading”. Terrain blading or whatever they called made us use these rollerblades that have all-terrain wheels for grass and gravel. We started innocently enough at the top of this hill in a park – the cameras started rolling and so did I.

I had had a lot of rollerblading experience so I was feeling cocky. I went down the hill at top speed and they only needed one camera angle to catch me tripping at full speed and my feet flying over my head from behind like I was auditioning for the DIVE TEAM. Ski poles and rollerblades and a dust cloud and my bruised body housing a bruised ego was in serious need of some alcoholic assistance. Call the zoo, something has escaped.

The Animal

I am a completely different creature when I drink. Recipe: Instant asshole, just add alcohol. Because the show pays for the food and drinks I had at least 3 drinks in front of me when we started our “courting” portion of the date. Sitting at the dinner table with little or no food, three drinks and the dumbest girl since Elizabeth Vargas I was barely holding it together – or was I.

This girl was a torment from the word go. She was stupid, high maintenance and boring – not even her tits could make up for any of it. As we continue to have a conversation where I am just listening to my own voice – I SPILL ONE OF MY MANY DRINKS ON HER.

When the scene ended TOM the producer asked me what everyone has asked every time this date is viewed, “Did you spill the drink on her on purpose?” When they show the show in syndication they even show it again in slow motion so you can get a close up of the spillage and judge for yourself.

I had a crappy time with that troll and I thought I was capable of saving any date, but once I knew the date was a loss, that is when I showed what a real pro I am at dealing with women.

Lesson From This?

Unfortunately there isn’t much I can pass on in the way of seduction advice from this experience, but I can give you the inside scoop on why you should think twice about appearing on any reality show. Do people watching the show really want to see you succeed? Probably not. What they want is entertainment, so if you’re truly looking for a love connection, don’t look for it by starring on a reality show.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

Is She Cheating?

By Jackson Morris

There is a saying, “When in doubt, there is no doubt”. This little piece of dime store philosophy applies to everything “instinctive”, most especially when it comes to relationships. I like to think that people are good by nature, but as humans our moods change which can change our emotions both spiritually and sexually with someone other than our significant other.

Let’s face it; the person you are with now is probably not the first person you have been with, thus like many, offering you “experience” to gauge current partners by. Many of us compare future partners to how well they stack up against an ex who was fabulous and treated us well. This standard is the opposite of what we feel when something feels wrong in our relationship.

Before we get started, I want to exclude the insecure, paranoid and what I call “repeat offenders”. If you are a person who has had at least 3 partners cheat on you, stop reading this, YOU are the problem. For everyone else who thinks “they are on to something”, keep reading.

Let us begin with covering the two types of guys out there. “Relationship Guy” is the guy in a committed relationship either married or not. “The Suitor” is the guy who is dating someone and they have not committed yet, and he wants to know before he does if she is sleeping with others as well.

Holding Pattern

Both guys need to look to the obvious first, taking a moment to reflect and decide how much her behavior has changed and if it did, when did this happen. Women are obvious about there emotions toward us and most wear them on their sleeve. Women lie too, but men are more seasoned cheaters as a generalization, making the women’s change more apparent. If she brought you lunch every Monday for two months and then got a new trainer at the gym on Monday that is a “red flag”.

For the married guy, you know her better than anyone, so if she suddenly took up skydiving and used to be afraid of heights, then she is growing elsewhere in life without you.

In the early stages of the Suitor’s and the later stages of the Relationship Guy’s tenure, you will see a change in her “pattern”. Women can’t help it; even a ruthless bitch of a woman will make some obvious mistake. They are nurturers by nature and can’t help feeling bad or trying to please too many people at once (not literally). If she is planning on leaving you, you would have to be blind not to see the change in that pattern.

“Our” Sex

In a relationship either committed or early on, there is a point when both parties can legitimately assume their partner is monogamous merely by the amount of time spent together, the heightened sexual compatibility and conversation to this effect. When this moment occurs, tangible or otherwise, the sex is now “our sex”, not his sex and not her sex, but our sex. When she wants it she comes to you, when you want it you come to her, it is an unspoken rule. When she starts turning you down for various reasons she better have a fatal illness or be on her period.

I always ask the question point blank, “How did you go from wanting to screw my brains out daily to not needing any sex at all?” Watch her face when she answers, if you don’t recognize her behavior or if it looks like she’s making it up, she is. If things are your fault, watch out! She will tell you because no one wants to go without sex in a relationship. Frankly, sex is second only to companionship. So if the top two reasons people commit are sex and companionship and she took away the sex, you’re only one step away from being out of the relationship.

What Where Why

What you should do is ask her. If you really think your girl is cheating (seeing other people) then ask her point blank to her face and not over the phone. The best way, is to make her dinner (trust me), tell her you want to make her dinner, then while you’re eating and she is feeling comfortable communicating with you, ask her, and be nice about it. Don’t accuse, just say, “Honey, I am worthy of hearing the truth, are you seeing someone else”? Again, no one knows her behavior better than you, watch and evaluate her reaction.

Where Where do go next if you still don’t know if she is or is not sharing the pooty? I hate to say it but you have to see for yourself with your own two eyes. For the married guy, the only thing worse than your women giving out the milk for free is if she divorces you and takes all your milk too. If your married, protect your interests, follow the bitch. That’s right, if you did the “what” and you are not satisfied, you don’t have many choices. For the Suitor, move on, that is where you should go. If you are just dating and you just don’t trust your girl, hit the bricks and find someone you feel comfortable with that is worthy of you.

Why

Why ask her? You deserve to know. Why follow her? She deserves to get caught? Why ask why? Your instincts told you too. Humans are like no other animal. We are the only animals that experience; regret, remorse, guilt and sometimes jealousy. Why do the humans get these emotions? We taught them to each other through our instincts, so trust yours.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

What Do Models Look For In Men?

By Melissa Balmer

Melissa: So the first thing our male readers are going to want to know is how a regular ordinary guy can attract a beautiful, exotic fitness model like you? What catches your attention about a man and makes you want to give him a chance?

Dana: I know this sounds cliché, but for me so much rides on personality and overall demeanor. Women are tired to the “macho” types and the guys who think it’s cool to act careless and treat women with little respect. Men need to find that middle ground that says I’m strong and tough, but I’m also intelligent and compassionate. Confidence is another key factor in attraction. I’m attracted to someone who is self-assured, but not egotistical. Appearance is very important to some women. I think it’s relative and in the eye of the beholder. What some people think is “good-looking” others don’t and visa versa.

Melissa: You’re known as the “Queen of Fitness” models and have been featured in more magazine pictorials than any other model in your genre, obviously you’ve got a beautiful face and a fabulous body, but what personality traits have helped your stellar rise to the top of the fitness model world?

Dana: I always treat everyone with respect, whether it’s a photographer, editor, make-up artist, or fan. Some models develop this “diva” attitude that suggests everyone owes them something. They are arrogant and catty. It’s a stupid move, because 99.9% of models can be replaced very easily. I treat people as if they’re family and I always give them the benefit of the doubt (until proven otherwise) and I think that has helped my career progress.

Melissa: You’ve created super hot photos and even videos – however – you’ve decided not to pose completely nude (though you seriously push the envelope) when many other models in your industry do. Do you think you’ll ever change your mind…say if Playboy came calling?

Dana: Playboy has contacted me on several different occasions. I was very flattered, because Playboy is such an iconic magazine. However, I had higher hopes for my career in the arena of acting. I didn’t want to sell out for 15 minutes of fame in Playboy then be blackballed or typecast when I attempted other more serious career endeavors.

Melissa: What type of shoots do you enjoy the most? And conversely, what’s the most challenging thing for you about being a model and constantly in front of the camera?

Dana: I enjoy indoor lingerie shoots the best, because they’re most comfortable. Outside shoots result in beautiful images, but it’s tough fighting elements like heat, cold, wind, etc… People don’t understand what models often go thru to get that perfect shot. It looks fun, but behind the scenes there’s a lot of work involved. There are many challenging aspects to maintaining a career as a model. Modeling once or twice is a piece of cake, but staying in the game is a different story. It’s just like any other business it takes discipline and hard work. Your appearance is everything in modeling, so you always have to be in great shape with good skin and healthy hair.

Melissa: At this point in your career how much creative input do you put into your various photos shoots? Do you have a say in the clothes, the styling, or the location? And do you decide on the type of merchandise for your fans?

Dana: Yes, I have a lot of creative control. I decide on my wardrobe, hair, and make-up. I also determine and approve all images for products and merchandise. I help decide on locations, but I usually leave that up to the photographer and crew.

Melissa: What do you think your fans would find was the most surprising aspect of your life as a model?

Dana: I’m just a regular girl at heart. Sometimes I’m goofy…I enjoy making people laugh. I also like to spend time outdoors and I don’t mind getting dirty. I’m not all about shopping and looking pretty.

Melissa: Finally, what sort of evening would a man have to put together for a date to completely sweep you off your feet?

Dana: It’s not always about what a guy can do to impress you; it’s more about the guy’s character. If he is a nice, genuine person then I’m open to the possibilities. I appreciate it when a guy goes all out for a date, but at the same time it’s not necessarily a deal maker.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

The Secret Of Seductive Eye Contact

By Jackson Morris

I stare at women of every age right in the eye and look at them as if to cause them to wonder “what he is thinking”. I am so comfortable in my own skin and with my sexuality that I can make men uncomfortable as well. Whether I am in a business setting or a social setting, I become Mr. Eye Contact. It is through the use of your eyes and simple glances that all SEDUCTION blossoms.

Mastering strong eye contact is not just about “staring”. When you are staring at a stranger to get there attention then remember this, the difference between a player and a stalker is “SMILING”.

Don’t over smile like you are on the red carpet with Tom Cruise and his pregnant concubine. You smile with your lips, your eyes, and even your brow muscles and cheek muscles. Try this: Express happiness with every part of your face without opening your mouth into a full smile. It is not hard if you relax and realize that all that real estate above your neck has millions of expressions.

The number one look of seduction is: MISCHIEF. If you convey the look of fun and mischief women will gravitate to you.

Remember, girls just wanna have fun. The look of mischief and seduction is the pinnacle of fun. The real key to learning YOUR strong eye contact is being consistent and EMBRACING ITS POWER. I am so skilled at facial and non verbal communication now that with merely one look I can tell a woman I want to screw her or tell a guy he is screwed. Embrace its power!

Just because a female looks “slightly” uncomfortable by your visual consumption of her presence does not mean she does not welcome it. Many women are not surprised when men attack with their eyes but are flattered when they can do it the right way and make them feel pretty in the process. All women want to be complimented and the best way to do it is without saying a word.

Women have mastered this act of mimes – think about how a woman has smiled at you in the past without saying a word and it practically melted you. Don’t think they are any more immune to seduction than you are – remember you are a man and men run the planet!

Eye Contact And Flirting

The cons to being the master gazer start with being eerie or creepy. If you look like a cool dude then you should not have to stare too long or too hard before you get the response you are waiting for.

If you stare too long and the girl starts to clutch her purse a little tighter then you are doing something wrong.

The BIGGEST con to having the kung fu grip with your eyes is that EVERYONE sees you. Yeah, that’s right when you become the male medusa and can paralyze females with a glance it does not mean no one is watching. Seduction looks are like energy beams and light sabers cutting through the crowd. You can not expect others not to feel the energy you are putting out to one stranger and ignore it.

The most obvious PRO to using eye contact is the appearance of CONFIDENCE. Confidence is the number one element a woman should get from your delivery. She should think that you smiling at her is the tip of the iceberg when it comes to YOU being in control.

These looks you are dealing out like a Vegas veteran better be able to be backed up. She will assume three things from a simple stare: Your interest level, your confidence level, and your seduction level. Hard to believe that all that information can be in a look, stare or glance but that is where we get the phrase “it was written all over his face”.

When you practice your craft, try not to over-think your look or goal. Just try to convey in the safest way possible to your target what you ARE thinking. If you think she is sexy, say it with your eyes. If you think she is adorable, then say it with your whole face. No matter what the case learn how to use looks and silence as your main seduction tool.

The more you say with your look and nonverbal communications the less you have to say out loud.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

Top 5 Questions Women Have About Men

By Melissa Balmer

“Why do you go through so much effort to get our phone number… and then don’t call?” – The #1 question women wanted answered by men

Recently I polled girlfriends, associates and any women who’d give me a response just what their top questions were that they had for men. I think you’ll find what they shared with me honest and enlightening. And guess what? You’re going to have the chance to respond on our message boards.

That’s right guys, after reading the questions and comments in this article we’d like you to post your thoughts to the Seduction Insider Forum and let us know your thoughts. I’ll select several of them to share with you next week.

So let’s get to it. Just what would women like to know about men? Here you go:

1. Why Don’t You Call When You Asked For My Number?

“Why do guys almost make complete idiots of themselves with all kinds of shenanigans (like yelling at me from their cars) to get my number, and then don’t call?” – Laurie 29, Los Angeles CA

“Okay, here’s one for you: Why do men ask for your number… and then not use it?” – Ellen 48, Los Angeles

“I can understand not calling after a date (or, even more so, a one night stand) after they’ve promised to do so. But I don’t get why they go to all the trouble of hitting on you and flirting with you… and then never do anything about it?

PS – this from a woman now in a happy relationship with someone who CALLS WHEN HE SAYS HE WILL.” – Gloria 23, Chicago

What Men Have Told Me

I have to admit that I’ve always been curious about the phenomenon of men flirting with you like mad, asking for your phone number, and then never calling. Here’s what a few men had to say in their own defense:

“I had some ‘liquid’ courage going on when I asked for her number, but in the sober light of day I lose my nerve, or I’m just not sure how attracted I was to her.”

“I don’t call because I’m dating someone, but the woman was so hot I just had to ask.”

2. Why Do Men Think They Have to Have “Rules” For How Soon to Call?

“There’s nothing worse than a guy waiting so long to call you that you can’t even remember who he is. I once had a guy wait two weeks to call and then he called at like 11:30 at night…what’s with that? Did he actually think I was going to take him seriously?” – Krista 32, Dallas

“Men need to understand that their “rules” for how many days to wait to call a woman are just as annoying and ridiculous as the “rules” of women holding out on sex for months in order to have a man take her seriously.” – Brenda 37, New York

What Men Have Told Me

“It’s all about keeping an edge, of not appearing to be a lonely pathetic loser who doesn’t have much else going on in his life but the possibility of dating this new woman.” – Michael 31, New York

It appears that men have made up all sorts of variations on the number of days to wait until they call just so they can feel a bit in control of the situation. To be fair, I can totally understand the need to feel there are “rules” to follow to feel in control, because nothing cools the interest of someone more than a person giving away all their power and being too available.

But what men need to understand (and really what everyone needs to understand) is that it isn’t how soon you call that matters, it’s how you handle the message you leave, or the conversation you have, and perhaps even more importantly how often you call after that. It’s your energy, your attitude and tone that’s important during that first conversation. You want to convey interest without conveying desperation for her to call you back NOW. That, and waiting too long to call is just plain rude. It really is, because we all know that when a man really wants a woman he’ll move mountains to get to her.

3. Why Do You Make the First Date the “Me” Show?

“I’ve been on so many first dates where a man is so into telling me how fabulous he is I couldn’t get a word in edgewise – and then this same men is baffled when I don’t return his phones call.” – Claudia 42, Chicago

“What’s with guys constantly selling themselves on the first date? I’m not looking to date their job, or their car, I’m looking for a connection.” – Gail 33, San Francisco

What Men Have Told Me

“The hotter the woman the more I want to impress her and unfortunately sometimes that means I get nervous and basically go into hyper-drive telling about myself, as if it’s a job interview.” – Craig 28, Chicago

Unfortunately it appears the more a man finds a woman attractive the more many of them feel the need to brag in order to impress her, not realizing that there’s a big difference between sharing about himself and grabbing the attention all for himself to brag. Conversations need to be give and take.

4. Why Do You Push For Sex and Then Judge Us if We Say Yes?

“Isn’t it time for the whole whore/Madonna issue to be over for men? It’s so stupid to have one set of rules for men and another for women. Men lose out of getting to know some great women just because she made the mistake of saying ‘yes’ to sex right away.” – Victoria 28, Vancouver

“Sometimes I feel like giving up on dating altogether. I wish that men could understand that most women who sleep with a guy right away aren’t losers, or immoral, they just had great chemistry and thought it would take things to the next level. I’m too busy with my career to play games and hold out and wait ‘x” number of dates or months when I meet a guy I really click with.” – Julia 37, Los Angeles

What Men Have Told Me

Sadly this one is still really a toss up, with many men still judging women harshly for saying “yes” to sex right away – though in general it does appear that men in their mid 30’s and under tend to be less so.

5. Why Are So Many of You So Inconsiderate in Bed?

“I don’t think most men have a clue how lousy they are in the sack. Really, they don’t seem to have any idea that great sex could mean more than them rushing to intercourse.” – Jackie 32, Dallas

“It’s really rare for a man to ask what I need in order to have an orgasm during sex. Most just rush through things and seem to assume that I’m having as much fun as they are and they don’t seem to hear me when I try to tell them what I’d like.” – Sophie 41, Palm Springs

What Men Have Told Me

Women don’t come with details instructions and we’re a huge challenge to figure out. Okay, I accept this, but far too many men are notwilling to talk about sex before rushing into it – when it’s a huge challenge to slow them down enough to focus.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

The Cure For Nice Guy Syndrome

By Jackson Morris

Nice guy syndrome is more than folk psychology – it is a disease. It has been called the Disease to Please. It is the endless effort to always do the right thing for others and be unselfish.

When nice guys have the disease to please a female to promote intimacy it usually ends up with the nice guy finishing last.

Nice guy syndrome usually starts with a guy courting a girl who appreciates him so much that she hurls him into the friend zone with both arms. She knows he won’t be mad, even if he was mad it is not as if he would say anything. Speaking out would be against the nice guy union rules.

Nice Guy Syndrome (Quarantine)

Some guys are in the friend zone before they even know they are, and are often sent back there as if it were their first time.

Men – wake up! You know if you got game or not. Don’t be a cherry picker. You know what a cherry picker is? It is the easy target, the lazy way. Just because some girl gives you kind attention does not mean you have the skills to break out of the zone.

Most especially, if your first real quest is after a close girl-friend and you have not been on a date or asked a girl out in some time you could potentially strike out & ruin the friendship. When a girl is being kink to you, you must develop the skills to decipher what is friendship and what is flirting.

When you can understand these subtleties: then you will know when you are about to enter the FUN ZONE as opposed to the FRIEND ZONE.

Being a good lover is not as important as being a good communicator.

Being a good communicator can make you a better lover but being a good lover does not make you a better communicator.

Know where you stand with a female and even make her do some of the work (see more articles on this site, there are hundreds) so that when you go to bat she does make you whiff some NICE GUY pitch.

Testing, Testing, Testosterone

Some people believe (me too) that being a nice guy or having the syndrome is directly related to low levels of testosterone.

Testosterone is a steroid hormone that enhances libido (sex drive), energy and even boosts the immune system. There is no clinical correlation between low testosterone levels and not being able to bag a beauty. I will say that if you are a guy with low levels of testosterone and you go out to places with guys that have high levels of it then you will not stand out and by default alone will disappear into the wood work – nice guy or not.

Many men who get labeled “the nice guy” (you know who you are) find themselves blaming the girls for not “appreciating” them or “seeing” that there is more to you than “meets the eye”. Nice guys don’t have less stamina than other men but they have less charisma than other men. If confidence is “soil” then charisma is the “flower” that grows from it.

Without charisma, rarely can confidence be seen or noticed. Of course the “strong silent type” like my editor after a seven day binge of sex and alchohol can “will” the love out of a girl.

Escape From The Friend Zone (Or Die Trying)

So, do you want to break out of the friend zone? Do you want to be more than a friend? Do you want to be a nice guy who finishes first? Do you want a new identity, young Aniken Skywalker?

Then go to the gym and start pumping the confidence machine. And I don’t care who you are and what your background is: If you train at a gym regularly then you will be more confident…period. But the only way to gain confidence, is to simply make it a focus of every breathing moment of your life. Every situation you go into, your goal is to do so confidently, and become more confident for the next situation you are in.

Then, start working on your charisma. However, charisma will not be found at the gym, it will be found inside your head and your head won’t believe it until your eyes start to see it. You will notice a change and so will other people. When that recognition comes in is when your mental bank account is beginning to grow.

Step two is to step up! Once your confidence is starting to show – go for the gold. Start practicing your “skills” on girls (not girl-friends) and if you can, study their responses. If they treat you with diplomacy or like a “brother” then you are STILL in the NICE GUY prison.

If you are hell bent at going to bat on a girl-friend then I suggest going off the deep end.

She probably already has labeled you with the nice guy tattoo and you want to show her you can be bad too. Well, you might have to. I am not saying be mean to convince her you are worthy; I am saying treat her like a bad boy would and she might buy in. One way to convince a girl you are not a nice guy is to quit KISSING HER ASS!

In summary if you want to get out of the nice guy corral you better break out with guns blazing and foul language. Nice guys “care too much” what a woman thinks.

The rest of us get to sleep with her. And she’s great in the sack. She really knows how to take it.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

Cheating Wife

By Melissa Balmer

Is your wife cheating ? Now that it’s being widely reported wives are quickly closing the gap and catching up with the number of husbands who are cheating (currently reports show that 34-40% of wives cheat on their spouses compared to 40-50% of men) it’s a good idea for men to get very clear on just what the triggers are for `cheating wife syndrome` that can send a wife astray. Three of the major reasons are:

Your Wife is Cheating Because She Feels Ignored

In the beginning your attention was all hers. You smiled every time she walked into a room. You bought her little presents for no reason other than to make her smile. You couldn’t wait to spend time with her, and hear everything going on in her life. Nor could you wait to get your hands on her to make love. But slowly your attention began to wander to other things. Your job takes a lot of time, your other family members demand your attention, you want to spend time with your buddies, you have hobbies and clubs you want to participate in. Let’s be honest, there are a myriad of things calling for a man’s attention these days. But here’s something to remember. Once your wife slips in importance in your life the trouble begins. Sure work is tough and stressful. Sure you need time just to relax and unwind at the end of a hard day. Yes you do need to spend time with your friends – but that doesn’t mean it’s cool to ignore your wife, or put her needs, and her requests, at the bottom of your list – because if you do you may well catch your wife cheating. If you start forgetting anniversaries, and birthdays, and the things you promised to do (not always first she’ll get annoyed, then angry, and maybe even cry. Next she’ll start to nag at you until you can’t wait to get away from her, which will make her even angrier still. But eventually she’ll start to ignore you the same way you’ve ignored her. Finally, she’ll move on with her life as if you were a roommate rather than her spouse. That’s when you’re really in trouble because she just might just find all the attention she’s missing in the arms of another man.

Cheating Wife Finds New Self Confidence Being Adored by a New Man

It’s hard for young men (or men who’ve been single for most of their lives and haven’t had the pleasure of frequent female sexual company) to imagine that men actually get tired of having sex with a willing partner. But they sure do. Unfortunately, what the men who get bored with their marital sex lives forget is that they are half the problem. If a man is bored with his wife in bed, there’s even a better chance that the wife hasn’t been having much fun either. Why is this? Because sex is simply easier for men to enjoy. Women have just as much capacity to enjoy sex as men, but remember, it takes quite a bit longer for women to become turned on enough to enjoy intercourse than men. And then there’s the dismal fact that 60% to 85% never orgasm from intercourse alone. Ah, I never said women didn’t have complex sexual machinery. So the sex isn’t hot anymore, for whatever reason (perhaps it never was), and instead of investing time and attention on your wife you’ve stopped noticing that she’s even a female. But another thing so many husbands forget is that just because they aren’t finding their wives particularly thrilling doesn’t mean another man won’t notice her female charms. If you`re truly worried about your wife cheating, take a good hard look at your sex life and consider making some significant changes. Nothing gives a woman tremendous new confidence like the adoration of a new man, especially after her old man has stopped responding. Yep. Even a wife who never thought she’d cheat might well reconsider when a new prince charming comes calling. And where can she meet such a man? Frankly, just about anywhere – the work place (even though it’s frowned upon), a PTA meeting, and let’s us not forget the Internet. Yes, while your Internet time might be focused on only admiring hot new female forms visually, your wife might be spending her Internet time in chat rooms and dating sites meeting real men.

You Cheated On Your Wife (Cheating Husband or Cheating Boyfriend)

Do I really need to quote you the old adage “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?” It really is true. And remember that women have that sixth sense thing going for them, so even if you’re not stupid enough to come home smelling like another woman’s perfume, or too fresh cause you just took a shower after an afternoon tryst, or have too many long conversations logged on your cell phone, or spend hours online into the wee hours of the morning chatting up your new passion – if you’re cheating your wife just might just feel it in her bones. And once she starts digging around and finding concrete evidence, if she doesn’t kill you, or make your life hell with her raging, or empty out your bank account and run home to her parents, she might just decide to get even. For you the “little bit” on the side might not have meant much, but trust me, your wife will take it very differently. And when a wife cheats with the idea of “getting even”, chances are you really won’t like who she gets even with. Yep, she’ll likely pick the sort of fellow who’ll do the worst damage to your jealousy and your ego.

What You Can Do To Prevent A Cheating Wife – The Same Is True For Preventing A Cheating Girlfriend

If you don’t want your wife to cheat the simplest solution is to make sure she’s the number one relationship in your life. It’s not always an easy solution, but it’s the best. The marriages that not only survive, but also thrive, are those where the partners continue to discover each other and grow together. And yeah, they have hot sex lives. Marital sex doesn’t have to become boring – if both parties are willing to keep being honest about what they want and need, and to be open to new things.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

Is My Girlfriend Crazy?

By Melissa Balmer

A Reader Writes:

Dear Melissa,

I struck out with my last girlfriend because she said I “didn’t know how to handle her.”

She was a very touchy woman who would fly off the handle if I misread her e-mails, or if I said a seemingly innocent joke that offended her. One second she would be smiling and happy, and then she would turn on me the next if I said the wrong thing?

I just would like to know what the best way would be to calm down an angry woman if I have done something in the relationship she disapproves of.

I was completely clueless at the time and still am a bit. I guess what is the best way to communicate with your wife or girlfriend when she is angry?

I just would like to see something about maintaining your woman once you have her.

—–

Melissa answers:

Men often feel totally in the dark about woman’s moods, and the fact that we can seem to fly off the handle for no apparent reason (as you point out). But books such as Louann Brizendene’s new “The Female Brain” explain that for certain things – like picking up the emotions from non-verbal clues – men and women’s brains are just wired differently.

Women excel at picking up non-verbal clues of communication, especially facial expressions and body posturing. Brizendone notes, “Girls’ well-developed brain circuits for gathering meaning from faces and tone of voice also push them to comprehend the social approval of others very early.

When your ex-girlfriend grumbled that you didn’t know how to handle her, it could well mean that you simply didn’t notice what was going on in her emotional world – and that includes yourself! Women can often tell when a man is in a bad mood, even if he doesn’t realize it himself.

The Power of Active Listening

But that doesn’t help you out. What you want to know is how to effectively deal with a woman who’s upset. The most important thing for a woman when she’s upset is to feel “heard and understood.” Passively listening, or pretending that you’re listening, just doesn’t cut it. As we’ve seen above, she’s going to quickly notice you’re not listening to her even if you think you’re doing a good job of pretending to.

However, assuming you know where she’s going with her argument, cutting her off in the middle of it, and saying quickly, “okay, I got it, I understand.” doesn’t work either. Basically, my dear man, you have no real option except to actively listen to what the woman’s got to say and then make her feel you’ve both heard and understood her. Please note, I didn’t say you need to agree with every point she makes. I said to make her feel “heard and understood.”

So how do you make a woman feel heard and understood? How do you actively listen?

First, and super important, you don’t plan what you’re going to say in rebuttal to her while she’s speaking, because that means you’re actually listening to the thoughts in your own head instead of her. You also make sure to keep good eye contact with her while she’s speaking, which signals to her that you are in fact listening well.

Very important, if her thoughts and worlds are moving too fast for you and you can’t keep up with her let her know. Don’t attack her; ask nicely for her to slow down or to repeat something you haven’t understood. Once she’s done you say something like, “Okay, here’s what I understood from what you said” (then you repeat what you understood).

Then you ask, “Have I got it right?” Notice, you’re not trying to win the argument, you’re just trying to understand what she’s upset about. That alone is going to take quite a bit of venom out of her feelings.

Be careful not to simply memorize what she said, but to truly “get” what the issue is for her. Once you both understand what she finds so challenging in the relationship you can have an adult conversation about it and resolve things.

John, another great reason to learn to be an “active” listener with women is that all of the great seducers are great listeners – they don’t assume what women want, they take the time to actually sit and hear what it is straight from the woman’s mouth.

Now let’s look at some ways you can keep from misunderstanding each other in the first place.

Create a Vocabulary You Both Understand

You’re probably thinking I’m a bit daft right now, that you both understand English perfectly well, right? Well, yes and no. Yes, both you and a woman you’re dating probably speak English, but the words don’t necessarily mean the exact same thing to you as they do to her.

You’ve probably noted already that “we’ll meet at 7:00” means something different to each of you. You might always be right on time, and she might be finishing getting ready at 7:00, so right there you have a possible “bone of contention” between the two of you.

Basically, there are an infinite number of ways people can misunderstand each other – especially when dating. We all come from different family structures, cultures, personalities, etc. For example, you may feel that after the 3rd date that you’re simply dating, while in the woman’s mind it might mean that you’re “an item.”

If you don’t take the time to discuss it you may find yourself expected to attend a family wedding with her automatically, and she may be livid with you if you blow it off. Is one of you right and the other wrong? Nope, it’s just two different points of views on what a relationship means at that state in the game.

A good rule of thumb is to do your best not to make assumptions about what you feel the other person’s behavior “should” be in a relationship without discussing it openly. Assumptions can kill an otherwise promising relationship. It’s up to the two of you to create a vocabulary together that both of you understand and can use together to build something stronger rather than constantly misunderstanding each other.

Don’t Make Each Other Wrong

I’ve been careful here to point out ways you can empower a relationship and not automatically make each other wrong. When frustrated in a relationship it’s so easy to point a finger and say “she’s wrong, he’s wrong, etc.” Instead do your best to step back and be curious about the other’s point of view. Again, you don’t have to automatically agree with someone, but you don’t have to automatically agree either – just stay open.

And don’t allow yourself to be made automatically wrong either. We women can act a bit superior about emotions because we’re so often more in tune with ours – but that doesn’t mean our emotions are right and yours are wrong. But it’s your job to sit down and figure them out!

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

Superman vs. Clark Kent

By Jackson Morris

If you have seen any of the SUPERMAN series then you know about his “dual identity” as Clark Kent. He maintained this “persona” of both men separately when in the presence of “danger” or in the presence of “Lois Lane”.

Superman only went after Lois Lane as the superhero because he tried consistently to court her as Clark Kent but she was not interested in the clumsy Kent.

The point made here is that even Superman could not bag the girl of his dreams as a “regular guy”. Make no mistake that women want the same things we want including the fairy tale wedding. Everyone wants to be in love but everyone wants assurance up front that the relationship will last and each of us “individually” won’t stray, lose interest, cheat, and lie or cause a rift.

Superman realized that his image as a trustworthy servant to the people was far more attractive to Lois than just the regular guy who might just be like everyone else……………a player.

We are All SUPER MEN

I started this essay with the Superman analogies so that you seasoned guys (and rookies) out there understand that when it comes to attracting the opposite sex everyone has an “alter ego” and the women out there that are marriage minded might not see you as a candidate if you can’t redeem yourself as a player first.

Player redemption is about taking the cool side of you and mixing it with the serious side of you so that you create an attractive balance of intrigue and stability. Eventually every player will shift gears and want to settle down with that special female. But keep in mind that special female might be impressed by your brio and stamina but she might also wonder if that same passion is insatiable. If she thinks you act that way with every girl and not just her then you will never be redeemed in her mind as a player

You are a super man because if you are not then what is your alternative? You don’t have one. Keep in mind that shifting personality gears is not about Jekyll & Hyde so much as it is about when to be one thing and when to be another. Player redemption is not about extinguishing your original personality it is about “controlling” it so she thinks you are all the guys she wants rolled up into one.

A little bit of this…a little bit of that…

When you meet a smoking hot chick who you think is the one but you met her by hitting on her the same way you hit on everyone else then she will think you have this game that you can not turn off. She might dig it and think you are sexy but she might wonder if you will do that with every girl you are with.

It is time to show her that the hot guy at the club she met is also a sensitive and caring man who has feelings and would like a commitment as well. The way you show her Player Redemption is when you two are in public and in private that you treat her like a lady…and you treat her like she is the ONLY lady that gets your attention. When Superman is in front of Lois (and others are watching) he acts like she is the only woman in the world. Player redemption will happen right before her eyes if she sees that you have a stable job or at least career goals that are tangible. Or, if she sees you “thwart off” any advances or flirtations from other women. Or, if she sees you doing kind deeds like volunteer work act as a benefactor. Those items are just the start of what your “split personality” should offer her. She needs to see that you are the best of both worlds.

A little bit of that…a little bit of this…

The other side of you (the side she met) is the side that will keep her “excited” so don’t lose that side either. She likes that side because that side of you is what got her interested to begin with. You can be a Player Redeemed and still be her personal player at home. So, do not ease up on the romance, in fact, make the romance a little dirty. I would even try to make the dirty romance coincide with a good deed. Meaning if you spent the day cleaning out the garage, raking leaves and grocery shopping without complaining then reward yourself with some good ole’ fashioned anal sex in the kitchen.

Being a bit of a bad boy that she can control and being a lot of a good guy that she does not have to control but admires will keep her interested 7 days a week. The top two reasons people cheat is insecurity and boredom so if you are a player redeemed and playing both sides of that field then she will not be bored and she will feel secure in knowing that she has your attention.

Player redemption is about understanding who you are; a multi-faceted individual with a unique personality. You (we) are capable of being more than one-dimensional. It is those personalities that we posses that make us fun and unique individuals. So if you are looking for Player Redemption I highly suggest taking a deep breath as you put on your cape and realize as a superhero the one person you will ultimately save is yourself.

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.

How to Get Past Shyness and Get a Date

By Grant Day

Dear Seduction Insider:

Long Story. NEED HELP. I’m a 28-year-old male, single.

I have a massage therapist that I have known her for 5 or 6 years. When I 1st met her she told me I should come back again next week.

When I did she asked if I had a girlfriend. Would I want a girlfriend? Would I have time for one?

Then I noticed she would sit on the table to give me the massage. Also one time she told me she did not work the coming Monday and I could go over to her place. Apparently I was too shy to take her up on the offer.

Well, life went on and she got hitched. She would still invite me to her parties, and say stuff like, “your legs are cut, we should make a sandwich.”

Well, just last March she told me she was getting a divorce. Now leap forward to recent weeks. She told me she was dating again. She also told me she has no problem getting men to notice her.

I also noticed that if I did not answer her emails right a way, she will not answer mine right a way either.

So should I ask her out for a drink or something? If I do when should I do it and how? I know one time she told me I could ask her anything, not just for a date. What do you think? Also I have been single all of my life.

Thank you for all the help.

—-

Grant Day Answers:

Time to Get Clear on What you Want to Make Happen

Okay new friend, what we have here is a laundry list of the times, places and ways the girl flirted with you and none of your reactions.

No matter what you’ve really got going on inside, what comes across is that either you’re not that interested and she’s sort of stalking you, or you’re numb with fear. Hello?

Do you like her? Are you attracted to her? Or do you simply think you should like her because she’s made her interest in you so plain and simple? You need to figure this out before you take any action.

Unclear reasons = unclear actions = mixed results.

Why are You Single?

You mention that “you’ve been single all your life” in a way that makes me wonder if you’re more than just single my man. Are you trying to tell me that you’ve never had a girlfriend, never had a date, and are perhaps a virgin?

I don’t bring up these issues to embarrass you, not at all. But it might explain why you’re so darn reticent to ask a woman out who is clearly showing that she wants you to.

So maybe it’s time to sit down and figure out just why you’ve always been single. Are you super picky and a girl that passes your muster hasn’t passed your doorstep, or are you shy and just haven’t gotten yourself out there and given yourself a fair shake?

I’m guessing on the latter (which is what’s true for most of us).

Here’s the deal, as with every other aspect of life, practice is what makes us good at something. If you’ve had relatively few dates (or none), and shyness has been keeping you from moving forward with this woman (or any other) it’s time you realized that it’s very easy to second-guess your life away.

Understand that shyness is the killer, not the possible rejection that could happen. Cause guess what? Rejection happens all the time.

You could call or email this woman and she could finally have gotten fed up waiting for you, or is just in a pissy mood that day, or whatever, and she could say, “no thanks.”

Yes, sure rejection stings a bit, but it’s not going to kill you. And the more times you screw up the courage to ask a woman out, the easier it’s going to get.

Will it ever be super easy if she’s super hot? No, but if it was too easy it would mean you were either too jaded or dead.

How to Ask

It sounds like this is a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go after it, but she’s smart to not answer your emails right away if you don’t give her the same courtesy.

So don’t play games, just go for it, ask her out. If you’re too nervous to call just drop her an email with something like “how about a drink next Wednesday?” in the subject line.

Say something like, “I’ve been wanting to ask you out for some time now, why don’t we meet at that cool new place on ____street next Wednesday?”

Ask her for a weeknight, not a Friday or Saturday.

Make the first date very casual but pick some place with great atmosphere so she knows you made an effort, it can even be for coffee instead of a drink, but don’t ask last minute because it’s very likely she will already have plans.

If she says, “no this week is bad what about next week?” take her up on it, after all she may simply be busy, and she’s been trying to catch your attention for some time now.

If she takes her time getting back to you, and you start to get nervous, send her a second email (only one!), or leave another message, and say something like, “Hey, I knows it’s taken me years to get it together to ask you out, but I promise we’ll have a good time.”

Good Luck!

Grant Day

Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www..com.