By Cole Stevens
Copyright © 2007, Seduction Insider, www.seductioninsider.com.
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14 Things You Gotta Do For a First Date
1. Pick a Date
Sounds simple enough, right? Well, the trick is to actually schedule a date. A first date might not seem like a big deal for a guy, but getting some one-on-one time can mean a lot to her. First dates tend to work better on Saturdays: It gives you more time to get ready, and you can also rest up from the previous work week, giving you both more energy and enthusiasm for the date.
2. Pick a destination
This is crucial. Finding the right venue for a first date is probably the most important aspect to the whole thing. If you and your date are chatting on the phone, search for clues in to her preferences. Does she have a favorite food? Is she adverse to certain other kinds of foods (like, no spices, or no sushi, etc)? Once you have some idea of what she might like, start searching for the right venue on the web, or ask your friends and coworkers for suggestions.
3. Make a reservation
Casual dining restaurants don't take reservations - steer clear of them anyways. A quality woman doesn't dream of getting swept off her feet at Applebees. Pick a local restaurant or a restaurant chain that takes reservations. If it's a high class restaurant, you should also be able to request a more intimate table, away from crowds and families.
4. Pick her up, and know where you're going
Okay, in today's modern dating world, some women will want to meet you at the restaurant for the first date. This is mostly because if you're a creep or they feel a sleazy vibe coming off you, they won't be stuck with you until you're ready to take them home. Regardless, make sure to at least offer to pick her up - even if she declines she'll appreciate the gesture. If she does accept your invitation, make sure to double check that you've got her address correct, and then map the route online. Ask her if there's any special traffic that you should expect so you can keep yourself on schedule. Also, be sure to know exactly how to get from her place to the restaurant afterwards.
5. Wear clean, ironed clothes
This should seem obvious enough, but just remember to wear fresh clothes from head to toe before you head out. An ironed or pressed shirt is a must - you want to impress her with your fashion sense. It's guaranteed that she's spent time getting herself ready for the date, make sure you're up to par.
6. Floss, brush, brush again, and shave
Hopefully, you two will be spending the evening hunched over a romantic candle-lit table overlooking something and telling tales about yourselves for hours. If that's the case, make sure your mouth is clean! Floss, brush your teeth, and do a good job shaving. If things move in the right direction, you'll hopefully enjoy a late night kiss (or even more), so get your hygiene in order.
7. Reconfirm that reservation
It takes about 45 seconds to pick up the phone, call the restaurant, and confirm your reservation, and this will also put you at ease that everything is going to plan.
8. Bring something for when you meet
Women love gifts, even on a first date. It doesn't have to be anything dramatic like a giant bouquet of flowers or a plane trip to Bermuda. A single flower or a bottle of wine (or both!) should do the trick. If you're picking her up, go with the bottle of wine - probably a chilled white will do the trick just fine (everyone can stand a glass of Chardonnay). If you're meeting her at the restaurant, bring a flower. It'll make her feel special, and she'll also have something to remember the date by. Lasting impressions are key to getting more dates!
9. Bring your game face!
A first date is like an interview for a new job. She's basically trying to find out if you're worth her time. Bring your game face and don't let anything get you down - optimism and positivity about setbacks will show her that you're the type of guy that doesn't take life too seriously. Also, get out of your comfort zone a little, but let her know that it's for her sake. She'll appreciate any extra effort you put in to the date.
10. Ask lots of questions
There's a line in the movie 40-Year-Old Virgin which just kills me: "Just ask questions." It's so true. If you find yourself rambling on about how you outsmarted Jim in Accounting last quarter, shut the fuck up and put the questions on her. She should be doing 70% of the talking. The more she talks, the better the date is going for you, trust me.
11. Don't get sloppy drunk
This is just stupid obvious. Watch your alcohol intake, and drink water throughout the date. Even if you're nervous or just looking to get wicked drunk, let her set the alcohol pace. If you start getting wobbly, she'll run to the bathroom and never return.
12. Pay the damned check
Guys pay. It's that simple. Just because this is 2007 and we're all supposed to be progressive equals doesn't mean that you can get out of the absolute foundation for dating. Pay the damned check, and if she offers to pay her share, make it clear that she can forget about it. If she absolutely insists, try to suggest that she can pickup the first round at a bar afterwards, or buy you coffee at the cafe down the street.
13. Have an after-dinner plan
Best case scenario, the date goes great. You've both enjoyed an awesome dinner and some good conversation. Don't let it stop there! This is why scheduling a first date on a Saturday night is clutch - if it goes well, neither of you have any reason to stop it until one of you does. Either that, or you wake up on Sunday morning trying to find your boxers. Anyways, have an after-dinner plan. There's basically a handful of good after-dinner options that are almost always available. Grabbing a cup of coffee and / or dessert is a great choice. Another option is to find a mellow bar to relax and get a few more drinks. Even another choice (depending on where you are) is just a walk. Any way you choose to make it happen, have an after dinner plan if things go well. If they go poorly - just bolt.
14. Wrap up the date right
Okay, truth is, most first dates don't end with a romp in the bedroom, but a good first date can mean better things yet to come. Make sure to wrap the date right by not being too pushy but also showing that you had a great time and want to see her again. If you've both driven there, make sure that she's okay to drive (especially the case if one too many Appletini's kick in), and if she looks tipsy, offer to hail a cab for her or give her a lift. If you're taking her home, let her guide you. If she immediately jumps out of the car and hollers "Thanks!" over her shoulder when she gets there, odds are the date went worse than you might think. But, if the date went well, she'll probably hesitate to get out of the car, and you guys can chat in the parking lot. Best case scenario - she offers you up for a "cup of coffee". Between you and me, it's not coffee on her mind.
Most importantly - have fun! Dates in and of themselves give you a cool opportunity to meet someone and start fresh. Don't revert to sob stories about how your ex took the dog or your boss pisses you off. Keep things lively and upbeat, and treat it like an old school romance like you see in the movies. If she's in to you, a great first date will definitely cement things down the road.
