How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time

“Why is it that everyone thinks a woman just needs a man to enter her to make her roll around wild-eyed in a crazed fashion and scream out in passion? I’ve read it hundreds of times, and that’s the main reason I thought there was something wrong with me when I didn’t have an orgasm after being `banged`.” – Naura Hayden

If you saw this book in the bookstore the title is the only reason you’d pick it up. Other than that it’s small, and obviously either self published or published by a small publishing house that doesn’t put a whole heck of a lot of thought into cover lay out – but the cover does state it’s been a New York times best seller with over 2.6 million copies sold, and it is distributed by one of the top publishing houses in the country.

And there’s a very good reason. This book is a little gem full of very honest advice that clues you into how the female sexual response actual works vs. what we’re usually fed by the media – and it teaches you a very hot technique.

I’ll be honest, Hayden’s new age speak isn’t for everyone, but the smart guy will wade through the fluffy prose and recognize that underneath the book is full of very solid information. Let’s look at the example of women faking orgasms (yeah, it fills us with dread but we’ve got to get a handle on this sad phenomenon dudes). Hayden interviewed 486 women for this book, 52 told her they faked it occasionally, 124 told her they faked it most of the time, and 310 said they faked it every time – of the remainder none said they never faked orgasms.

Okay, I should note that this book originally came out in 1982 (though it was updated in 2001) however, the sad fact is that in that time, while men have become far more generous and knowledgeable with their tongues and female orgasms via oral sex, women and men haven’t come much closer to improving women’s ability to orgasm during intercourse. So Hayden’s message is still timely indeed. In the book Hayden notes:

“The vast majority of men are definitely inept lovers, but it’s not their fault. You can’t blame them. How are they to know any better? And if women were any smarter on the subject, they’d teach the men. But they aren’t, so the men keep groping and the women keep faking.”

Before getting down to her secret technique Hayden takes umbrage with how she (and frankly the rest of us) are brainwashed by the media to think that “every really sensuous woman needs only to have a man enter her to have her scream with passion and writhe with desire.” Since she’s apparently sure we’re not going to believe her (but of course we should because that’s basically what we see almost exclusively in porn) she gives us five pages of excerpts of exactly the type of writing examples she’s speaking of.

Okay, so let me stop here and say there are women who have fabulous orgasms from plain old intercourse – but they’re not nearly as many as men think, nor do they usually happen in the average seven minute time span that most men can last for intercourse. And Hayden is right to point out that there really is no way to figure out if a woman is faking it – especially when you’re so hot and bothered you can’t think straight. Even scientists are now noting how well women can fake orgasms.

Basically the only way to know she’s not faking it is in a long-term relationship where the woman keeps asking for intercourse.

But what you really want to know is what the hell is this great technique that guarantees as woman an orgasm. Here are the highlights but I highly recommend buying the book: Chapter 2: Teasing

Learn to be a deliberate Tease. Hayden points out that there is a “direct line from a woman’s nipples to her clitoris.” Take a slow, indirect route – don’t rush into anything. Start with a very soft touch, even one that feels too soft to you to do much of anything. By teasing a woman you show her you’re in control, and that you know just what to do to completely turn her on before you even approach intercourse. Chapter 3: The Main Event

Here’s big secret #1: Use your favorite tool to continue to tease her very sensitive private parts. That’s right, rub her clitoris with your penis, rub the outer lips of her vagina, and tease her with it lightly. Master yourself and show her you’re in charge. Tease her until she starts asking you to enter her…and then tease her some more. You’re literally making her vagina itch with desire inside.

Then…you begin introducing your penis into her vagina…but only slowly by half-inch increments – and then you back out again, very slowly. She’s going to be going crazy and you’re going to love the feeling of power. So you keep it up, gradually going in a half an inch further each time, but also drawing all the way out again – because Hayden’s having you focus all of your energy on the first third of a woman’s vagina where most of the nerve endings are (just like in your penis). When I’ve done this technique I’ve even pulled all the way out and teased the woman’s clit again for a few strokes before going back in…keep this up and any woman who’s relaxed and open to it (and is already orgasmic) is going to have a fantastic orgasm.

In closing I leave you with some more advice from Hayden gives you some food for thought:

“The reason not to go all the way in with your penis is that when you do, it rams against her clit, and the whole purpose of this is to tease her clit – not to hit it, but to create a desire that drives her mad until she has an orgasm.”