What Women Want -

What Do Women REALLY Want? Two Simple Details, This Article Will Shock You...

Want to succeeed with women? Understand what women want and then exactly how to give it to them so that you get what you want from women.

Let`s start things off by talking about a man’s ability to listen, and also his ability to be charming regardless of the situation.


What Women Want: Listening Skills

I’ve learned the hard way that if a man isn’t going to listen to you at the very start of getting to know you, he isn’t going to listen to you very well any other time either. The saddest fact about this is that the man might really be interested and care about a woman, but he thinks it’s far more important that he constantly “sell” himself to her rather than taking the time, energy and interest in really getting to know her.

I see this mistake made on internet dating sites all the time. Men make it sooo obvious your picture caught their eye and they didn’t have the time, interest, energy etc. to actually read a woman’s profile, interests and personal preferences. With many men, what the woman is looking for doesn’t seem to matter a bit, what matters is that the man finds the woman attractive. Wrong! Chemistry works both ways guys, and one of the best ways to find and then build emotional and intellectual chemistry (you won’t know about the physical chemistry until you’re in person of course) is to take the time to really listen to what the woman has to say.

Just yesterday two men wrote to me on a personals internet site. One man, 45 , send me several paragraphs about himself in his first introduction email without ever mentioning once why he felt drawn to write to me in the first place. For some reason, men over 40 think it’s fine to basically write out their resume’ to a woman before they even find out if the woman is interested. While they may think it comes off as confident and shows how well they’ve done in life, from my point of view (and from the point of view of all of the women I’ve conferred with) it comes across that the only thing the man is interested in is himself and should therefore be left free to do so…alone.

The second man, 32, instead wrote a much shorter email where it was clear that he’d read my profile and found it interesting. He received a note back from me opening the door to further conversation, the first man received a note back from me saying no thank you and that perhaps he should rethink his emails being all about himself.

Look, no one likes to be in a conversation with someone who only talks about themselves, everyone likes to feel they’ve been heard and understood. There is a huge difference between being confident, which is appealing, and being overconfident and bragging, which is a total turn off. A beautiful, very charming young woman I use to work with went on a date with a man who sent her a beautiful flower arrangement to our office the next day. When I asked her how the date went (quite impressed by the flowers) she said it had been one of the worst dates of her life, he hadn’t asked her one thing about herself or let her get a word in edgewise the whole evening. Now guys, I have to tell you, this is a very outgoing, gregarious young woman with a fantastic social life – not some wall flower. When he heard nothing from her for a few days, he sent another flower arrangement, but she is never going to call.

Don’t make the same mistake. Don’t spend your hard earned money on internet personals, clubs, bars, and then dates with women, only to ruin your opportunity by being so engaged in your own world that you forget to engage in hers.


What Women Want: Charm

This week I went to the CES (Consumer Electronics Show) in Las Vegas to help a client set up their trade show booth. There I was, in a sea of men, (some of them the movers and shakers in some very important industries) and guess what I realized? The suits and the tech geeks have a lot to learn from the Union guys who set up the booths. That’s right, the Union guys had more charm this week than most of the other men I met together.

Charm and ease in talking to women takes practice. You aren’t going to automatically be smooth with the women who dazzle you, so it’s important to ease into your charm skills by practicing them on all kinds of women you meet. Men are so “one track minded” that they don’t realize and recognize the opportunities during their regular business day to do this.

I had to smile to myself as I trudged back and forth from the hotel to our exhibition tent, always surrounded by hoards of men who could barely grimace in reaction to my smile, let alone smile back. True, dead tired, wearing my glasses, little make up and layers of sweaters, I wasn’t going to win any prizes for being my sexiest self, and yes, we were at the set up for the biggest trade show in North America. Still, it was very amusing to know the very same men who were ignoring me in their worries of the day are the exact same sort of men who send love letters to me online at dating sites.

No matter how frantic, stressed and obsessed with work you are, life is going on all around you and it’s a shame to miss out on it. Also, women aren’t mind readers, you may give them an admiring glance from behind your sun glasses, but if your face is set in stone she figures your heart and libido are as well.

The union men, on the other hand, were very sweet and charming, entertaining me with jokes and offering me rides on their go karts when I needed to run errands. Setting up this show was just another day of work to them, and they can recognize a woman who’s willing to be nice and cordial back, even if it’s a busy work day and she isn’t dressed for a glamorous night out.

Every day the opportunity to be charming is presented to you on a platter. Every day you run across a member of the opposite sex to whom you can be polite, charming and courteous. Only the most egotistical self centered woman is going to like it if you’re only charming to her, but ignore everyone else (including her mom and other female relatives) so every day you have the opportunity to brush up on your skills. And the thing about women? We’re always watching. You may not have seen us standing 4 people behind you at the local grocery store when you were sweet to the tired, overworked check out lady, but we did…we did, and we’re just looking for an opportunity to see you at the store again and say hello.