Inside Tristan Taormino
by Rachel Kramer Bussel
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Writer, porn director and sex educator Tristan Taormino's name has come to be associated with anal sex, thanks to her how-to book The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women (and two Evil Angel videos of the same name), as well as her video House of Ass, not to mention the two Vixen Creations butt plugs named after her. But the thirty-seven-year-old New York-based author of the Village Voice's "Pucker Up" column is branching out, both with her Vivid Ed line of educational porn films on oral and anal sex, the Chemistry series (Vivid) - Volume 1 won the AVN Award for Best Gonzo Video - and her latest book, Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships (Cleis Press).
Here she talks about how she casts her porn films, new techniques in oral sex, the mainstream acceptance of anal sex and the ins and outs of polyamory.
Q: Let's talk about Chemistry first. How did that series evolve and how do you pick your performers?
A: The whole premise of Chemistry is that there's no script. I take a group of six to eight porn stars, put them in a house together and film everything. It's shot very on the fly, documentary style.
Q: Are you the one doing the shooting?
A: I have two camera guys, I shoot, and everyone on the cast gets their own camera. No one's done this before. The talent have this little camera called the perv cam. They can shoot whatever they want. They can do POV, they can go in the bathroom and get a blowjob and shoot it. Or they can shoot fellow performers. I never know what is on there until I get into the editing room.
Q: Do you give them direction or is it a free-for-all?
A: It's a free-for-all. Technically, we only have three cameras, so there can't be more than three separate scenes going on in three separate rooms, but what I found out is when you have people who actually really like their jobs, they'll fuck even if they're not getting paid.
Q: So they're on for that whole thirty-six hours?
A: Yes, and they sleep over. When I pick people, I say to them, "I don't want you to say, well, I'm not doing anything else that day, so yeah, I'll do your movie." I want them to be excited about it.
I cast one person, and I ask them for a list of people that they really want to work with. From that list, I pick the next person, then that person gives me their list, and I look for overlap between the first two people, and then that person gives me their list. So the hardest person to cast is the last, because they have to be, essentially, on almost everyone's list.
Q: How is this different from other takeoffs on reality TV?
A: There are really jaded, mean reviewers who've said, "This is nothing new," as if there's a hundred porn movies that are like this, which there aren't. In fact, the big porn reality TV takeoffs are scripted. They're scripted to be like The Real World or Big Brother.
Q: What rules do you give the talent? Do they have to have sex with everyone?
A: No, but for it to be counted as a scene, there has to be at least one camera, and it can't be in the pitch dark. They can sleep with whoever they want. The big thing that I tell them is, "Forget everything you've ever learned in porn." They've got to let go of the formula of "you're in this position and then in two minutes, switch."
Q: On your web site, you give a breakdown of which sex toys were used in each film. Do you supply the toys?
A: I have a deal with Babeland, Phallix and Liberator Shapes, so I get toys from them. It's a tradition that there's always a crazy spread; there's probably fifty toys to choose from. There are scenes where there are no toys at all, but there are scenes where there's a lot. I just want to make the atmosphere fun.
Q: Why do you think it's important to bring an arsenal of toys? Do you do it because you want them in your movies, or just to give them more options?
A: More options. A lot of people still won't shoot vibrators during intercourse because they make noise, which fucks up the sound. Depending on what kind of vibrator it is, like a Hitachi Magic Wand, it covers what we want to see: pussy. So a lot of people just don't use them. I would say 89% of porn stars, when given the option of using a vibrator, will take it.
Q: What do you think you're offering your audience with Chemistry that's not already out on the market?
A: I strongly believe that the dominant view in the porn industry is that couples and women want feature porn. They want big budget, script, plot-they want it to be a Hollywood movie with hardcore sex. And the truth is, not all women want the same thing. I like gonzo. The problem is, if you go to the video store right now, and if there's a gonzo section, it is likely you're gonna pick up something that's gonna offend a lot of people, because it's degrading, because there's no focus on female pleasure or female orgasm, because there are these circus stunts of "How many things can we put in how many orifices simultaneously?" And people-not just women-go, "That just doesn't turn me on."
My gonzo goes back to the original definition: There's no script, and you allow for spontaneity. I don't need to give them a script; I just want to let them talk. For the behind-the-scenes segments, I find that when I first start interviewing them, they're giving the same bullshit they say in all the behind-the-scenes videos. But then when you make them feel comfortable and they trust you, they say the most outrageous, insane things.
Q: Why did you start the Vivid Ed line and what is your mission with it?
A: The Vivid Ed movies [The Expert Guide to Anal Sex; The Expert Guide to Oral Sex, Part 1: Cunnilingus; The Expert Guide to Oral Sex, Part 2: Fellatio; and The Expert Guide to the G-Spot] are really educational, and they're fun and sexy, but they're more educational than the Evil Angel videos, for sure. I've been teaching my anal sex class for almost ten years, and now I get to capture it on film in almost the exact way I teach it all around the world.
Q: Who would you say is your audience for Vivid Ed?
A: Women and couples, but I don't want to discount men. Sometimes men get stereotyped as much as women in terms of their taste in porn, or what they want, and certainly, anyone can watch these. The one thing I'm really conscious of is that even if you don't watch porn or are porn shy, you can watch these movies.
Q: Because the goal isn't so much to get off as to learn?
A: Exactly. The way that we have structured it, which no one had done before, is that the viewer has a choice of watching the scenes with instructions or without. Which means there's no "come shot" in the cunnilingus video, in the traditional sense, because that's not what it's about. The women have plenty of orgasms, because that's the focus of the scenes. When you watch it with instructions, the pace is slower. There are voiceovers and pop-ups that come on the screen and tell you what's going on.
Q: In terms of the topics you've chosen for Vivid Ed, with oral sex, people know what it is. They have questions, but it's not necessarily something you'd think of as having innovations.
A: I disagree. I feel like there are still people, men and women, who want advice about what to do. The really good thing about the cunnilingus video is it's explicit. It's not a long shot where you see a vague oral sex scene. You zoom in and Justine Joli is right there-Justine's the teacher in that one. She says, "There's this technique," and then she does it. So it's not, "Oh look, she's going down on someone." It's step by step. It's really specific and really explicit.
Q: Are there more videos planned?
A: We are going to do threesomes, female ejaculation, anal pleasure for men, erotic bondage and spanking. And I really want to make a handjob video, handjobs for guys and girls.
Q: You're the director on all of these . . .
A: And I'm in some of them, but not in others.
Q: Without giving away all your secrets, is there anything specific in the oral videos, like a signature move, that you can tell us about?
A: What I call the Pressure Technique in the oral sex video [cunnilingus], I would say that's the signature move. The woman Justine was demonstrating it on had never experienced it, and it made her come. And then in the blowjob one, it's gotta be a finger in the butt. In the blowjob video, there are a couple things: There's a bonus scene on prostate stimulation. Never before in an instructional video has there been anal play on a guy. Never. In the anal sex video, the whole thing is my secrets.
Q: How is that different from your earlier anal sex videos?
A: This is way more what I would consider straightforward educational. I love the Evil Angel videos, but I recognize that there's a certain percentage of people who're like, "Hmm . . . a ten person gang bang, that's not really my speed," and this is really for those people. By far the most amazing orgasm that I've ever shot on film is in The Expert's Guide to Anal Sex, and it's with Adriana Nicole and Manuel Ferrara. It involves the spoon position, the Hitachi Magic Wand and anal sex. It lasted for four minutes. It was amazing. I still think about it to this day.
Q: How do you keep your anal sex workshops interesting for yourself? Also, you have a revised edition of your book, The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex. What's changed in terms of people's knowledge about the subject?
A: There's 125 pages of additional material in the second edition. I just know so much more now than I knew then, hands down. But I also think the dialogue about anal sex has changed so dramatically.
Every time I teach it, there's a new group of people who have questions or who want information. To me, it's never repetitive or redundant because of the people. These days, the questions are more savvy and advanced.
Q: People who've probably tried it and have a question, versus people who've never tried it?
A: Exactly. And it's way more common for a guy to raise his hand and say, "So, when my wife fucks me in the ass . . . " That would not have happened in 1998, and now that happens routinely in my workshops. Now it's like, "Doesn't everyone?"
Q: I think there is still also the assumption that anal sex only means a man puts his penis in a woman's ass. I think that's why women are so afraid of it, to go from nothing to that. How do you respond to that?
A: That's absolutely true. When I was on this radio show yesterday, I told them you've got to warm up, like one finger and then two. And the host said, "I can't go from one finger to my dick?" I said, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but what's the size gap between one finger and your cock? Big, right?" And they're like, "I never even thought I could put two fingers in someone's ass." And I said, "Here's the missing link. Here's why you're not doing it right."
Q: There's also this idea that you have to do all of this at the same time, not that you can start with a finger and build from there.
A: I always pick a guy in my workshops and zero in on him and say, "If your partner has never had any kind of anal play, you're not getting your dick in her ass tonight. Let go of the idea, the fantasy-it's not gonna happen." Everyone is shocked by that, but when they think it through, they realize, "Right. That doesn't have to be the goal." Yesterday someone asked, "What if my girlfriend says, 'I'm okay with rimming and a toy, but not your dick?'"-then, great, go for that.
Q: Tell me about your new polyamory book Opening Up. Why did you write it, and have you always considered yourself polyamorous?
A: It's a multi-genre book. It's definitely a how-to, in that there are tools and strategies for how to have a healthy, positive open relationship, but it's based on interviews of 126 people from all over the country, ages twenty to seventy-two, so it is not just me telling you how I think you should do it.
Have I always considered myself a polyamorous person? No. I don't consider myself a polyamorous person right now. I talk about different styles of open relationships in my book, and one of the styles is partnered non-monogamy, and it's essentially a partnered couple, and there's stuff on the side, but there's no additional serious relationships.
Q: I think there's this idea that if you're non-monogamous, there are no rules. There's still a lot of stereotypes about open relationships.
While you were working on the book, what's the biggest thing you learned about the subject?
A: There's no pattern. You can say what people have in common, but no one's relationship looks like anyone else's. The variety of people I interviewed was fascinating: people living in the deep South, an enlisted member of the armed forces, a gaming commission officer, a massage therapist, a minister, a bunch of sex workers . . . it cuts across all different walks of life.
Q: I want to talk about swinging. I think it still has the seventies connotation, but I know plenty of young, urban people, whether they call themselves swingers or not, who go to sex parties. Is there a difference between the swinging community and polyamory?
A: Yes. I have a chapter on swinging, and I talk about how it requires its own style. Swinging is about the context in which people practice non-monogamy. It's about the community. It's a social thing and most swingers are involved with people who also identify as swingers. It's a really strong tight-knit community.
The difference between people in their twenties right now is that there's a movement of bisexual swingers, where men can have sex with other men, which is a huge taboo in the traditional swinger community. I talk about swingers in the book. I put it out there as an option.
Q: I sometimes sense that swinging is considered "second-tier."
A: Absolutely. There are poly people who feel like if you're having sex for the sake of having sex, or if you're having sex and friendship, but not deep love or a soul-searching connection, then you're not highly evolved. Who am I to tell anyone how to do their relationship, and who is anyone else? Swingers have found a way that works for them. Some of my best friends are swingers. Some of my best friends are monogamous, too. It's all good.
Q: Do you have a sense of how many people in this country are living a polyamorous lifestyle?
A: I would estimate 20%. Oprah did a survey of 14,000 people on her web site, and the question was, "Are you in an open marriage?" Twenty-one percent responded yes. There's also some research from the nineties that puts it in the 20% range.
Q: I want to talk about the pansexual event Dark Odyssey, which you co-produce. Can you tell me what it is, and why it's important to you?
A: We have two events a year. It brings together people from alternative communities who normally stick with their own, for lack of a better term: swingers, pagans, people into Tantra, S & M people, straight people, queer people, gender variant people.
Q: How many people attend?
A: In the summer event, it's 300 people, in the winter, it's anywhere from 500 to 1,000. There are workshops and special events. You can take five classes a day or do nothing but play and party the whole time. It's exceeded my wildest expectations of breaking down these false boundaries between communities.
One of the big themes is about trying new things and stepping outside your comfort zone, and dipping your toe into unfamiliar water. That's a big part of it; swingers come and take their first S & M class, and S & M people have sex in public for the first time, Tantra people meet pagans.
Also, especially at the summer event, anything goes. We're on 200 acres of secluded land and you can be naked and have sex anywhere except the dining hall and in the pool. People come up with insane fantasies and it really is whatever you make it. You eat all three meals out of a dog bowl.
Q: Do people do that?
A: Yes. Someone this [past] year created a cruising area in the woods at a designated time. People went and had crazy anonymous public sex in the woods.
We're one of the only events that lets single men come. It's not a couples-only event.
Q: What's been the most crazy thing you've witnessed there?
A: Someone had a fantasy of being roasted on a spit over a fire, and they created this thing in the mud and fulfilled that fantasy. And there's a petting zoo.
One time, someone did "Stranger in the Night." You signed up, gave your room number and the location of your bed, and you could be visited by this woman between one and five a.m., and the only rule was safe sex. And she didn't know who anyone was; she did it all night. That was her fantasy. She would creep in unannounced and molest these people . . . with their prior consent.
Q: What's next for you?
A: More sex ed movies. I'm launching a new web site, openingup.net, and, you know, total world domination.
Find out more about Tristan Taormino at www.puckerup.com.
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