By Melissa Balmer
Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www.seductioninsider.com.
Hello Melissa,
There is tons of advice for men how to raise their score with women and so little about the other way round. My question: What precise actions can I undertake as a woman to become a "magnet for men" apart
from being beautiful, which I am, but it doesn't seem to be enough to
encourage men to approach me. Or: How do I seduce men without being looked upon as a slut? Kind regards,
Freya
Hi Freya:
Thank you for reading Seduction Insider. Our women's section is new
so please check back often as we will have more articles for women
coming in the next weeks and months.
You're right. There isn't as much information for women online as
there is for men. My personal theory for this is that in the U.S.
and Britain women will happily go to the bookstore and buy
relationship books while men won't. Men prefer the privacy of
the internet.
Now let's get down to what I advise. Beauty is no guarentee of
popularity with men. Beautiful women often intimidate men
especially if they appear aloof. If you happen to be shy yourself
you've got a real problem because no one's starting the
conversation.
You state that you don't want to be looked upon as a slut, and
that's certainly understandable. I do want you to notice, however,
that men feel more comfortable approaching a women who seems
easy and comfortable with her sexuality - i.e. one who dresses
sexy. They figure if a woman dresses sexy she likes herself and
sex and they think she'll be more open to speaking with them.
I'm not for one minute suggesting that you buy a whole new
wardrobe, but I am suggesting that if you're comfortable dressing a
little sexier than you do now it might be a good idea when you go
out.
Also, men are very attracted to women who know how to enjoy
themselves and have a good time regardless of the situation.
A woman who can laugh at herself and the minor foibles of life
is very seductive. You may have had the experience of meeting
men more easily on vacation because you left your worries at
home. Challenge yourself to do this when in social situations.
Try your best to put yourself in an easy happy frame of mind.
Create a mantra for yourself before you go out that you repeat
again and again in the car, bus, etc. so that you get out of your
every day stresses and into a mode of having a good time.
For shy and reserved people I highly recommend connecting
with members of the opposite sex via internet dating. Take
your time choosing a site that feels right for you and has profiles
of men you find interesting - and then unlike what most women
do - don't sit back and wait for the men to approach you. Write
to men you find interesting even if you find it embarassing and
difficult to do. Women need to understand what pressure men
feel under to always be the ones to start everything. It isn't fair.
Write to men who you feel you have shared common interests,
write to men who've traveled to places you'd like to go, write to
men you find attractive - you don't have to come on strong, just
let them know that you find them interesting and would like to
know more about them.
Make sure you post a good recent pic of yourself and try to be
as interesting and creative with your profile as you can. Let
the real you, and what you're looking for in a relationship shine
through. And of course, many men will write directly to you
first.
Most of all learn to have fun at the whole mating game and
you'll find you draw men to you. I wish you great success
and hope you'll keep reading.
